Breathe
by Mistmantle
Summary: Houston, we have a hiatus. Anyways, Sharon and Rusty head home after the confrontation with Rios and Taylor, and try to talk it out. Rusty realizes something needs to be said. One-shot.


They rode home in silence. For once, Rios hadn't protested Rusty's living arrangements. Maybe she could see the pain in both Sharon and Rusty while they were in Taylor's office.

Streetlights flashed over them in waves. Rusty was looking out the window, but he chanced a glance at Sharon when they turned on to her street. Her face was stony, but her eyes were awash with emotion. He couldn't tell what it was in the flicking light. He sincerely hoped it wasn't disappointment. He could deal with anger, deal with pity, but he didn't like disappointment or tears, especially when they came from Sharon.

He had come to like her, maybe even love her. Everyone he had ever loved had left him, so maybe he was just trying to prolong the inevitable by not telling her how much she meant.

_She told me. I should tell her, before- _he cut himself off. He wasn't going there. Not now. There was still a faint hope Sharon would last. Maybe they could stay together. _I could talk to that Emma and maybe she'd let me-_

"Rusty. Come on." Sharon's voice was soft as she got out of the car. She led the way through the lobby, heels clicking. She reached for the elevator button, and it dinged as soon as she touched it; the elevator was already there. A few moments later, they stepped out to the carpeted eleventh floor. Sharon pulled ahead of Rusty, fumbling in her pocket for her keys as they passed 1105, 1107, reached 1109. She unlocked the door and they entered the darkness of her condo.

She kicked her heels off at the door, dropped her bag on the table, threw her coat over the chair. Rusty hung back in the entryway, slowly taking his shoes off. He knew she was really upset when she didn't put everything away in its proper place.

After another long minute, he couldn't delay any longer. He walked out to the main room and found Sharon standing on her balcony, staring out at the night. The city sparkled with lights, and it was beautiful from his vantage. He followed her gaze, eyes landing upon Griffith Park, where everything had started.

"Sharon?" he stepped up bedside her.

"Oh, Rusty," she breathed softly. "Why didn't you tell me?"

He looked down. "I thought I had it under control. And. . . . I didn't want you to worry. You've already got so much to do-"

"I will always have time for you. Anywhere, anytime, no matter what's going on." She inhaled sharply and he looked over to find she was crying. She had never cried before. Even outside Taylor's office, where she looked ready to fall apart, she had kept everything bottled up.

"Sharon-" he turned and hugged her tightly. He could feel his own façade starting to crack, so he squeezed her tighter. After the scantest moment, she hugged him back, just as tightly. Barefoot, she was barely taller than he, so she buried her face in his shoulder. Her shoulders started to shake as she cried. Rusty grimaced when tears began to leak down his cheeks. Every instinct was telling him to run, but instead he rested his chin on Sharon's shoulder and fell apart.

He didn't know how long they stood in the night air, leaning on each other. After a while, he realized Sharon had stopped crying. His tears had dried long before hers, and he lost himself in the stars. He stared at the sky, not thinking anything, until she pulled away. Her face was smutched with mascara and eyeliner, and she ran her fingers under her eyes, trying to wipe the darkness away.

"Let's go inside," she whispered. They stepped in and sat on the red sofa, Rusty in the corner, Sharon at his side. She pulled on his shirt collar and rubbed it with her thumb. "I'm sorry," she murmured. "I've gotten my make-up all over your shoulder." She tried to laugh, but it sounded forced.

"It's okay. I'm pretty sure I got your shirt kinda wet, and it's probably one of those 'dry-clean only' things." He decided to try for humor. "Why did you even bother buying a washing machine? Nothing you wear can be washed."

She smiled faintly. "I may have one or two things that can get wet." She pulled her feet up and leaned against his shoulder. "Rusty, if worst comes to worst, I will see you at the trial-"

"No, Sharon," he said sharply. "No. I'm not going into foster care, or witness protection, or anything like that. If they try that, I am gone."

She was reminded of his first weeks with him. "Rusty, we may not have a choice. For once, DDA Rios may be right."

"Don't you side with her, too!" His voice rose sharply in panic. "I won't leave you! I don't care what Emma says, or Taylor, or anyone else!"

"Rusty." She turned to look at him, taking his hand tightly in hers. "I don't want you to leave. I want you here by my side. But I want you safe." Tears threatened to spill over again. "I want you safe. If that means you have to go somewhere else-" she stopped and looked away, then back. "If you have to go somewhere else to be safe. . . . I don't want anything to happen to you."

"I stay with you. I'll do whatever it takes. You can drop me off at school, I won't go off campus, patrol can pick me up and take me straight to your office. I don't care."

"It's not that easy," she said, sighing. "Nothing we want ever comes easy. You have to fight for every inch of ground you gain. Sometimes it seems impossibly hard and sometimes it seems like you're losing ground."

He looked down at her. "Sometimes you just have to pick yourself up and keep going."

She smiled. "Yes. You just have to get up and try harder."

"Can we try harder with Emma and Taylor?" He held his breath.

Sharon was silent for a long minute, and Rusty was beginning to wonder if she had heard him.

"Yes," she breathed finally. "Yes. We can try. Maybe we could suggest having you rotate homes. You could stay with Lieutenant Flynn one night, maybe Lieutenant Provenza or Tao, and spend some nights here. You'd be safer that way, moving around. I can talk to Commander Taylor in the morning." She leaned against him again, entwining her fingers with his and squeezing tightly.

They sat quietly, slowly relaxing. Rusty slouched down on the couch, and Sharon lay next to him, her head on his shoulder again. He closed his eyes and breathed deeply. _In. . . . Out. . . . In. . . . Out. _After a moment he opened his eyes. The condo was much darker than it had been, and he realized he had fallen asleep. There was a warm weight on his side, and he found Sharon had fallen asleep, too. Her glasses were still on her face and she hadn't let his hand go, but she was smiling slightly.

"Sharon?" he whispered.

She started awake, jerking away slightly. "Rusty?"

He wrapped his free arm around her shoulders and she relaxed back against him. He licked his lips nervously, knowing what he wanted to do. "I love you, too."

She turned to face him in surprise. She stared at him, then hugged him tightly. "Good, because I'm going to make sure you're stuck with me."

He grinned and relaxed in her arms. The last things he was aware of were Sharon's arms, wrapped about him, holding him safe from all harm.


End file.
